Sternberg's Triangular Theory of Love: All 8 Types Explained

Intimacy, passion, and commitment: three ingredients whose presence or absence, in combination, shape the form love takes according to Sternberg's theory. This summarizes a psychological theory for general interest and isn't meant to sort any real relationship into a fixed category.

Non-love (no intimacy, no passion, no commitment)

None of the three components are present β€” most of the passing, everyday relationships in life fall here, such as briefly greeting an acquaintance.

Liking (intimacy only)

Comfort and closeness exist without passion or long-term commitment β€” this describes genuine friendship, such as the ease of being around an old, familiar friend.

Infatuated Love (passion only)

Strong physical or emotional attraction exists without intimacy or commitment yet built up β€” the feeling of falling hard for someone you barely know, such as love at first sight.

Empty Love (commitment only)

Only the decision to stay in the relationship remains, without intimacy or passion β€” this can appear in a relationship that continues mostly out of obligation, without much emotional connection.

Romantic Love (intimacy + passion)

Emotional closeness and physical passion combine without yet extending into long-term commitment β€” the early stage of a relationship where two people are deeply drawn to each other but haven't made promises about the future.

Companionate Love (intimacy + commitment)

Passion has faded, but deep intimacy and long-term commitment remain β€” common in long-standing relationships, such as a married couple or close friends of many decades.

Fatuous Love (passion + commitment)

Commitment is decided quickly, driven by passion, before real intimacy has had time to build β€” relatively unstable, as when a couple gets engaged in a whirlwind shortly after meeting.

Consummate Love (intimacy + passion + commitment)

All three components are present in balance β€” the theory's ideal form of love, which Sternberg considered harder to sustain than to reach in the first place. A relationship combining deep understanding, excitement, and firm commitment reflects this type.

What is the Triangular Theory of Love?

Psychologist Robert Sternberg proposed in 1986 that love can be described as a combination of three components: intimacy (emotional closeness and connection), passion (physical attraction and romantic excitement), and commitment (the decision to maintain the relationship and stay responsible for it). Depending on which of the three are present, the theory produces eight distinct forms of love.

Is consummate love the ideal, then?

Consummate love β€” with all three components present β€” is treated as the theory's most complete form, but Sternberg argued that reaching it is often easier than sustaining it over time. Passion in particular tends to fade naturally as a relationship goes on, so maintaining consummate love typically takes deliberate effort to let intimacy and commitment fill the space passion leaves behind.

Frequently Asked Questions

Can a relationship's type change over time?

Yes. In Sternberg's theory, intimacy, passion, and commitment each tend to change at their own pace as a relationship progresses, so the same relationship can shift from romantic love toward companionate love, or through other combinations, over time.

Is a relationship without passion, just intimacy and commitment, still love?

Sternberg's framework classifies this as companionate love, a recognized form of love in its own right. Fading passion doesn't mean love has ended β€” the theory's core idea is that love simply takes different shapes at different stages of a relationship.