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Gathering Evidence for a Contested Divorce

Tap through each step to see what kind of evidence matters when preparing for a contested divorce.

  1. Understand why evidence matters

    In a contested divorce, the court decides the grounds for divorce, who was at fault, and how to divide property based on the material submitted, so concrete, objective evidence can significantly influence the outcome.

  2. Gather evidence related to infidelity

    Text or messaging app conversations, photos, and records showing the two people were together at a specific time and place β€” such as card transaction records or phone records β€” can all be useful.

  3. Gather evidence of abuse or mistreatment

    Medical reports, hospital records, counseling records, police reports, and photos taken at the time of an incident are important pieces of evidence.

  4. Gather evidence related to property

    Property deeds, bank and brokerage account statements, pay stubs, and tax records are worth organizing in advance, since they matter for how property division is decided.

  5. Gather evidence related to childcare

    Records showing who has actually been the primary caregiver β€” school or daycare communications, records of accompanying the child to medical appointments, and similar documentation β€” can be relevant to how custody is decided.

  6. Be careful how you collect evidence

    Evidence gathered through illegal means, such as unauthorized wiretapping or trespassing on someone's property, can backfire into a criminal issue for you or may not even be accepted as evidence, so be careful about how you obtain it.

  7. Organize everything in chronological order

    Preparing a simple timeline noting the who, what, when, where, why, and how of events makes both attorney consultations and the litigation process significantly more efficient.

Calm, organized preparation is where it starts

If you're preparing for a contested divorce, organizing objective evidence calmly matters far more than an emotional reaction. Knowing what kind of material you'll need in advance can save you a lot of trial and error later. This is general information about preparing for divorce litigation and not a substitute for advice from a family law attorney, so discuss your specific situation with a qualified professional.

Evidence rules β€” including what counts as legal β€” vary by jurisdiction

Laws around recording conversations, taking photos, and accessing someone else's devices or accounts vary significantly from place to place, and what's permitted in one jurisdiction may be a criminal offense in another. Before you collect anything you're unsure about, it's worth checking your local wiretapping, privacy, and evidence laws, or asking an attorney directly, rather than assuming a method you've seen elsewhere is safe to use.

Frequently Asked Questions

Can a conversation I secretly recorded be used as evidence?

A recording you made as a participant in the conversation is generally usable as evidence in many places, but secretly recording a conversation between two other people can raise wiretapping or privacy law issues, so be careful.

If I don't have much evidence, does that mean I can't get divorced at all?

No β€” a mutual-consent divorce can proceed based on agreement alone, regardless of evidence. Evidence mainly becomes important when the couple can't agree and the case moves to a contested divorce.